Grafts

A friend told me something very mean earlier - something which he probably meant to give as an advice but which seemed like a mean insult. I’ve never heard anything like it since a mishap in my early teens, which scarred me for life. So it really upset me, but I didn’t have the balls to tell that person to fuck off.

Oh well, I should probably just stop whining and get back to work.

middleearthquotations:

- Haldir to Merry, The Fellowship of the Ring, Book II, Lothlórien

middleearthquotations:

- Haldir to Merry, The Fellowship of the Ring, Book II, Lothlórien

(via take-me-to-middle-earth)

ivemissedsomething:

Hobbit production video #5

[x]

(via fellowshipoftheringers)

The following quotations are taken from official court records across the nation, showing how funny and embarrassing it is that recorders operate at all times in courts of law, so that even the slightest inadvertence is preserved for posterity.

  • Lawyer: "Was that the same nose you broke as a child?"
  • Witness: "I only have one, you know."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?"
  • Witness: "By death."
  • Lawyer: "And by whose death was it terminated?"
  • -----
  • Accused, Defending His Own Case: "Did you get a good look at my face when I took your purse?"
  • The defendant was found guilty and sentenced to ten years in jail.
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "What is your date of birth?"
  • Witness: "July 15th."
  • Lawyer: "What year?"
  • Witness: "Every year."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?"
  • Witness: "Gucci sweats and Reeboks."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Can you describe what the person who attacked you looked like?"
  • Witness: "No. He was wearing a mask."
  • Lawyer: "What was he wearing under the mask?"
  • Witness: "Er...his face."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "This myasthenia gravis -- does it affect your memory at all?"
  • Witness: "Yes."
  • Lawyer: "And in what ways does it affect your memory?"
  • Witness: "I forget."
  • Lawyer: "You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "How old is your son, the one living with you?"
  • Witness: "Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which."
  • Lawyer: "How long has he lived with you?"
  • Witness: "Forty-five years."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?"
  • Witness: "He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'"
  • Lawyer: "And why did that upset you?"
  • Witness: "My name is Susan."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?"
  • Witness: "No."
  • Lawyer: "Did you check for blood pressure?"
  • Witness: "No."
  • Lawyer: "Did you check for breathing?"
  • Witness: "No."
  • Lawyer: "So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?"
  • Witness: "No."
  • Lawyer: "How can you be so sure, Doctor?"
  • Witness: "Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar."
  • Lawyer: "But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?"
  • Witness: "Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "What happened then?"
  • Witness: "He told me, he says, 'I have to kill you because you can identify me.'"
  • Lawyer: "Did he kill you?"
  • Witness: "No."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Now sir, I'm sure you are an intelligent and honest man--"
  • Witness: "Thank you. If I weren't under oath, I'd return the compliment."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "You were there until the time you left, is that true?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "So you were gone until you returned?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "The youngest son, the 20 year old, how old is he?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Were you alone or by yourself?"
  • -----
  • Witness: "He was about medium height and had a beard."
  • Lawyer: "Was this a male or a female?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "I show you Exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize that picture."
  • Witness: "That's me."
  • Lawyer: "Were you present when that picture was taken?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Do you know how far pregnant you are now?"
  • Witness: "I'll be three months on November 8."
  • Lawyer: "Apparently, then, the date of conception was August 8?"
  • Witness: "Yes."
  • Lawyer: "What were you doing at that time?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "She had three children, right?"
  • Witness: "Yes."
  • Lawyer: "How many were boys?"
  • Witness: "None."
  • Lawyer: "Were there girls?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "You say that the stairs went down to the basement?"
  • Witness: "Yes."
  • Lawyer: "And these stairs, did they go up also?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "What is your brother-in-law's name?"
  • Witness: "Borofkin."
  • Lawyer: "What's his first name?"
  • Witness: "I can't remember."
  • Lawyer: "He's been your brother-in-law for years, and you can't remember his first name?"
  • Witness: "No. I tell you, I'm too excited." (rising and pointing to his brother-in-law) "Nathan, for heaven's sake, tell them your first name!"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Did you ever stay all night with this man in New York?"
  • Witness: "I refuse to answer that question.
  • Lawyer: "Did you ever stay all night with this man in Chicago?"
  • Witness: "I refuse to answer that question.
  • Lawyer: "Did you ever stay all night with this man in Miami?"
  • Witness: "No."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?"
  • Witness: "All my autopsies have been performed on dead people."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Were you acquainted with the deceased?"
  • Witness: "Yes sir."
  • Lawyer: "Before or after he died?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to and were able, for the time being excluding all the restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station?"
  • Other Lawyer: "Objection. That question should be taken out and shot."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "And what did he do then?"
  • Witness: "He came home, and next morning he was dead."
  • Lawyer: "So when he woke up the next morning he was dead?"
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Could you see him from where you were standing?"
  • Witness: "I could see his head."
  • Lawyer: "And where was his head?"
  • Witness: "Just above his shoulders."
  • -----
  • Lawyer: "Any suggestions as to what prevented this from being a murder trial instead of an attempted murder trial?"
  • Witness: "The victim lived."
i-was-punk-now-i-am-just-stupid:

Beautiful..

Hi Arwen bby ko

i-was-punk-now-i-am-just-stupid:

Beautiful..

Hi Arwen bby ko

verisiel:

My Red Book of Westmarch!

After five months it finally arrived! Five. Months. (completely worth it)

AND IT IS GLORIOUS

Click for the contents: (the post would be too long for dashes)

Read More

I NEED THIS IN MY LIFE

thecreativedork:

Halo-halo
About a week ago, I was brought to a province somewhere in the Philippines and in one of the restaurants we dined in for lunch, we were given this popular Filipino dessert to end our meal. Served inside a buko, it was the damn best halo-halo I’ve ever tasted. I enjoyed it so much that my travel buddies found humor in me eating 2 servings.
The Creative Dork | The Travelling Dork

thecreativedork:

Halo-halo

About a week ago, I was brought to a province somewhere in the Philippines and in one of the restaurants we dined in for lunch, we were given this popular Filipino dessert to end our meal. Served inside a buko, it was the damn best halo-halo I’ve ever tasted. I enjoyed it so much that my travel buddies found humor in me eating 2 servings.

The Creative Dork | The Travelling Dork

(via thecrimsondusk)

hobbitsplease:

lotrconfessions:

 Sometimes I wonder about what Gandalf says to Pippin in the movies about death. Gandalf is a Maia so he’s describing what ‘death’ is like to him. Of course he can’t really die. But Pippin’s a mortal, and not even the Valar know what death is like for mortals. But of course Pippin wouldn’t know all that. So while it’s touching that Gandalf comforts him with his words like that, it’s kind of sad that it isn’t really going to be that way for Pippin in the end. 

TUMBLR STOP MAKING ME CRY SO EARLY IN THE MORNING GAAASH

hobbitsplease:

lotrconfessions:

Sometimes I wonder about what Gandalf says to Pippin in the movies about death. Gandalf is a Maia so he’s describing what ‘death’ is like to him. Of course he can’t really die. But Pippin’s a mortal, and not even the Valar know what death is like for mortals. But of course Pippin wouldn’t know all that. So while it’s touching that Gandalf comforts him with his words like that, it’s kind of sad that it isn’t really going to be that way for Pippin in the end.

TUMBLR STOP MAKING ME CRY SO EARLY IN THE MORNING GAAASH

(via take-me-to-middle-earth)

Hobbits have been living and farming in the four Farthings of the Shire for many hundreds of years. Quite content to ignore and be ignored by the world of the Big Folk, Middle Earth being, after all, full of strange creatures beyond count. Hobbits must seem of little importance, being neither renowned as great warriors, not counted among the very wise. In fact, it has been remarked by some that the Hobbits only real passion is for food. A rather unfair observation, as we have also developed a keen interest in the brewing of ales, and the smoking of pipe-weed. But where our hearts truly lie is in peace an quiet, and good tilled earth. For all Hobbits share a love for things that grow. And yes, no doubt, to others our ways seem quaint. But today, of all days, it is brought home to me, it is no bad thing to celebrate a simple life.

(Source: aryanymeria, via a-balrog-of-morgoth)